The Demons In My Garden

We finally had some decent weather this week after so many days of rain, so I decided to take advantage of it and catch up on some chores in the garden. I was really eager to get out there because a garden tends to misbehave if you�re not vigilant about maintaining it. In addition, it�s important to keep a careful eye out on the riffraff that shows up when gardener supervision is absent for extended periods.

Well.

I must have been away for much too long because all hell broke loose out there, literally. Not only did the plants and weeds spin out of control, but I discovered � much to my horror - that demons had moved in.

Yes, really, demons. I have proof. Take a look:

These are the most evil things you�ll ever find in your garden. Their official name is Lilioceris lilii, but they�re commonly referred to as �red lily beetles�. And if you�re unfortunate enough to have your garden infested by them, you can kiss your lilies good-bye. Which is what I did yesterday.

Lily beetles eat the leaves, stems, buds and flowers of lilies, fritillaries and other members of the family Liliaceae. Within days. And by the time they�re done with them, the poor plants look like they�ve been run over by a train.

There are no registered chemicals for lily beetles, and there are no natural predators or parasites of these demons in North America, so you have two choices in dealing with them:

1) Regular handpicking and crushing of eggs, larvae and adults. Adults can be drowned in soapy water is you�re queasy about crushing.

2) Avoid growing susceptible plants in the first place. This includes numerous beautiful cultivars of lilium.

Last year, I spent weeks trying to keep these beetles at bay. And they kept coming back. Again and again. They ate through my lilies until they looked like they�d been put through the shredder. It was a sad sight.

The garden is much larger now with a lot more responsibilities, and I do not have the time or the patience to deal with lily beetles this gardening season. And next gardening season. And every gardening season after that. So yesterday, I made the sad decision to do without lilies. When I got outside, I removed the ruined plants; they looked horrible, and the flowers on many of them didn't look like they were going to open, after all, because of how damaged they were.

Lilies are my favourite garden bulbs, but they're too much trouble. I will just have to do without them until a suitable remedy for demon beetles is found. Perhaps a natural predator will be introduced in time that will keep these pests at bay.

Until then, no more lilies for this gardener.

Good-bye, my sweet plants. I will miss you...sniff...

[reaches for kleenex...dabs tears from eyes...]

Jeez, you guys...get a room...